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in-between love


i have come to realise that there is a real difference between solitude and isolation, and sometimes the boundary that separates them is so dangerously blurred.

i have been flawed and i have been hurt and i have been home and i have been tired and i have written the whole damn house down and i have swam in the clearest waters before the blood let loose and i have been lonely and i have let the chai brew and i have been alone and i have been inside my self and outside of my self and i have seen the way a heart beat grows with the rhythm and i have been in love and i have seen the moon cry and i have been a child and i have been everywhere, i have known my body and i have known the night sky like the thickest organ and i have known so many things that even the silence is plentiful, plentiful even when we cannot see so much of it. 





The bodies of two Tampa teenagers were discovered Thursday morning on a roadside in Duval County.
Angelia Mangum, 19, and Tjhisha Ball, 18, were found about 1 a.m., according to law enforcement. A witness told Jacksonville news station WJAX the teenagers were bound with zip ties and lying on top of one another.
"Two witnesses were driving by and they saw bodies and they called 911," Sgt. T.K. Waters told news station WJXT.
Officers were dispatched to Sisson Drive, near the intersection of Main Street North and Clark Road.
Investigators suspect foul play and are trying to determine the causes of death.
"They were in an area where they would have been noticed, so I think it was fairly recently since they’d been left there,” Waters also told WJXT.
A medical examiner has taken the bodies to determine the cause of death.
"I just don’t understand what happened," Ball’s sister, Crystal Moore, said.
According to Moore, both women had been living in the Jacksonville area off and on for approximately a year and a half.
"I feel like sometimes that I failed," Ball’s mother, Jerlean Moore, said. "What could I have done? What could I have taught her better? It hurts…it really hurts."
It’s a pain that’s only worsened by the fact that no one has been caught.



let’s care just as much about black girls being murdered as we do about black boys. signal boost.

(via foxxxynegrodamus)

"Sometimes I wonder how all those who do not write, compose, or paint can manage to escape the madness, melancholia, the panic and fear which is inherent in a human situation."
-Graham Greene (via fleurlungs)

(via elizabeth-antoinette)


"I’m going to be an astronaut. There’s another world out there. And I want to go there."
(Jammu, India)

for brown girls who dare to dream so big, I love you.


"I’m going to be an astronaut. There’s another world out there. And I want to go there."

(Jammu, India)

for brown girls who dare to dream so big, I love you.

(via bhagyawati)

Anonymous:   You ate just so beautiful , I could never talk to you as much as I want too

talk to me, darling.


food should be free. water should be free. housing should be free. power, fuel, electricity should be free. basic necessities should be free.

the idea of “people should have to work for a living” carries the implication that some people deserve to die

(via tinyblkbirdd)

thursday isn’t friday.

thursday isn’t friday.


1. i cling to the order of things, and sometimes that order is the way to factor in the chaos.

2. these past few weeks i’ve really realised who is really down for you when you’re down.

3. i have always been absolutely generous with everything i have. it’s always seemed natural to me that anything i have/i am is temporary and therefore not fully mine. i have remained considerate of folks, i extend everything fully - from money, to time, to food, to small things that make you know (including with strangers) that i care. i have realised that a large number of people will take whatever you offer/got but never return the love/heart/generosity at even a fraction. it’s strange, i’ve never really understood how folks can happily exist in that state of selfishness but then i’m reminded we live in a culture that rewards it.

4. these things make me tired, feel out of place, lonelier than i’ve ever been. at twenty five i never thought i’d be here, so invisibly here.

5. did you know that south asian women are 3 times more likely to commit suicide in this country than their white counter parts? and although there are very clear links to honour based violence, i also can’t help that this is symptomatic of a culture and a society (both asian and white majority) that does not see or hear asian women and girls. we are absolutely invisible, we have no voice, we are seen to exist as solely conduits for our men, culture and community. so what then or how then do we begin to talk about mental health - about these women and girls (particularly under the age of 24 who no doubt largely come from poor households) that are dying - that we do not know the names or stories of? do their lives matter so little that nobody - including many of the women around them - show up?

6. i’ve been reflecting on some of the themes that naturally emerge in a lot of my stories - things that seem subconcious or necessary. there has been an absolute dearth in british asian literature, the narratives produced are ones that continuously reflect what is required by a white audience to be a valid ‘asian’ story. i in all honesty cannot name a british asian writer who has moved me in any kind of way other than meera syaal through ‘life’s not all ha ha hee hee’ and the only international writer that is someone i can list as a favourite still has its limits. something seems to stop at ‘diaspora’ and ‘immigration’, we stop complicating what it means to really exist here (and maybe long or not long for home in different ways). and whilst some things are definitely some people’s experience (e.g. brick lane), they don’t speak to the humanity we have constantly are denied or plough through. ‘life’s not all ha ha hee hee’ was that moment for me that introduced diverse south asian women who reflected some or many of the struggles or could see the asian women around me struggling with. it went beyond ‘honour’ (whilst including important elements of it that permeate the everydayness of asian culture’. with my short stories, the pieces i’ve been working on have no real nostalgia for a back home - they incorporate the lives of second generation british asian girls. i realised that i had unconsciously been writing about eating disorders and self-harm, of anxieties and insecurities, of displacement, of london as a real location/context of what it means to be ‘here’, of an everydayness i have so rarely found myself in the books i’ve picked up. at the back drop of this is always the residue of immigration, of violence, of white supremacy, of anti-blackness, of invisibility, shame, class, sexuality that needs to be there. i’d also like to consider in particular muslim south asian women as existing as ‘south asian’ and it not all be entirely collapsed into being ‘muslim’ which for me is forever at risk of reproducing very dangerous narratives. as some of my work begins to be published and i begin to really think about a collection that is meaningful to me, i hope that whatever i create is somehow reflective of asian women and girls as people, as human, as existing even against such a deafening silence.

7. i know i will get out of this place eventually, it’s just finding a way to get to that ‘eventually’ point. i’ve been steeped in ‘self-care’ and sometimes ‘not-so’ self-care. i run and work out hard, i eat all the wrong things, i’ve cut almost everyone off because in truth nobody is listening/cares/is considerate of/expects/thinks i’m some robot that even when i’m vulnerable it’s not in the right form to be considered, i do things i shouldn’t that are now becoming routine and strangely comforting, i take sleeping pills and spend my days outside my body/self. i will eventually get out of this place, eventually.

8. eventually.


We are launching a cowdfunding & donation campaign for both Ackee & Saltfish The Web Series and The Strolling Series.

If everyone who watched the trailer to Ackee & Saltfish donated just £1 we could raise over £20,000.

You can find out exactly how your money will help us at » «

Essentially it comes down to this, it is already hard to get funding as an artist, period, but when you are trying to get funding for projects that are uncompromisingly by and about black people, it’s extremely difficult.

If everyone who watched Abraham’s episode from the strolling series donated just £1 we could raise way over £15,000.

We want to take strolling everywhere from Paris, to Kampala, to Brooklyn, but we need support to make that a reality. Similarly, we want to make The Web Series Ackee & Saltifsh of the highest quality and we need support for that. Also our actors work for free. We all moan about people selling out and doing shitty roles but these are professional actors and they need to eat and pay rent so support them!

"The place in which I’ll fit will not exist until I make it." - James Baldwin

We are making it. Help us to continue to make dope art, for dope people


TWITTER: @cecileemeke

"I tell my students, ‘When you get these jobs that you have been so brilliantly trained for, just remember that your real job is that if you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else. This is not just a grab-bag candy game."






Hogwarts Founders
» Idris Elba // Lucy Liu // Hrithik Roshan // Angel Coulby

While I do love that whoever made this did a good job matching actors to characters, the one issue I have is that Hogwarts is in England and what founded several centuries ago. I’m not saying that there wouldn’t have been blacks or asians in England at the time, but it’s still a historical inaccuracy to depict them as anything other than white Englishmen, since the culture of England at the time wouldn’t have had room for blacks and asians as anything other than slaves or traders.

Please don’t take this as me being racist, this is just me with a debilitating and incurable need for historical accuracy.

So let’s see. The Sorting claims it’s origins about a thousand or so years ago in it’s song, which implies the 1000s. JK Rowling described them as “medieval," which is about 500 to 1500, again agreeing with our 1000 date. So let’s work with that. We’ve got a pretty decent timeline to work with here. 

There have been black people in Scotland since “classical times,” and black moors present in James IV’s royal court in the 1500s, plus there’s St. Deiniol in Wales in the 500s, implying black people were also in the religious court instead of all just slaves and servants. Therefore, could a strong and fearless future-Gryffindor have ancestry native to the Isles? Hmmm.

Hannibal of Carthage was definitely not white (at least not in the modern sense). As a matter of fact, many Mediterranean descended people are mixed with Central Asians, South Asians, and North Africans so… But anyway, in 1555, black men were learning to be interpreters in London to help with trading in the Ghanian region. Here’s a coat of arms with black people on it dated 1616. Also, literally how do you not know about Dido Elizabeth Belle, an aristocratic lady of Scotland from the 1700s???

The Romani migrated out what is now modern day India and Pakistan in about the 1000s, so add in that they’re wizards who can fly and all that jazz, they could’ve easily gotten there within a year or two and settled in Scotland once they learned white people weren’t treating them very kindly. There you go, that’s how a South Asian Slytherin made it to Scotland just in time to found Hogwarts.

Here’s desi people of color from the Indian subcontinent, called Lascars, who had been sailing in Europe from as early as the 1400s, possibly earlier, still fitting that there could’ve been wizards in the British Isles about a hundred or so years earlier. Art from the 1600s showing brown men in turbans. Here’s an Indian man who in the 1700s ran a successful restaurant in England and taught white people to shampoo their hair lol.

Japanese emissaries came to Europe as early as 1584 and observed there were already Chinese and Japanese slaves among the overwhelmingly black slaves, something blamed on Christianity, which was part of the reason why Japan vehemently became isolated from that point.

Also about East Asia, Mongolian Genghis Khan made it to about Poland-ish in the 1200s, so it’s not a far bet to say the Chinese (who were also conquered by Khan on his way to Europe) could’ve found their way to Scotland around that time or a few hundred years earlier. Along with a smart cookie who would go on to be the founder of Ravenclaw.

Native Americans, of course, have been present in Europe for a while. In the 1500s, Manteo and Wanchese arrived in London. There’s evidence the Vikings and Indigenous Americans were friendly long before when Columbus blah blah, and there’s even evidence of Native Americans in Holland that’s like 2000 years old. Could a kind and loyal future Hufflepuff be one of those mixed race indigenous American-Africans?

ALSO considering the fact that Binns (the history professor at Hogwarts) specifically stated that witches and wizards were being persecuted and Hogwarts was built out of sight of Muggle eyes, it’s completely possible that POC came to Scotland and built the castle happily for other magical humans to have a safe place. Since HP universe is a fantasy anyway, read these article while you’re at it.

So yeah, I understand your implication that you don’t want to be racist or anything like that (bc being called racist is ofc so much worse than actually being ignorant), but POC were not just traders and slaves in the British Isles, they were a fuckton of other things your history books aren’t telling you (or trying to intentionally steer you away from). So me having an all-brown cast for a location in a dominantly-white place I’m sure is irking the fuck out of you, and that makes me so glad to see you confronted with that “incurable” need for historical accuracy you have.

And check out this rad blog: Racebending Harry Potter.

how come the only time people mention the enslavement of black people in Europe is when they want to deny our presence in fantasy fiction?

And that’s what it really boils down to pretty much every time.

Because someone couldn’t deal with a single photoset with characters of color in a FANTASY setting. None of the “fact checking” is really necessary, because that isn’t really the issue. Fantasy fiction isn’t something that should be subject to “proof”, but when it comes to racial diversity, it invariably is every time.

It’s my hope that with Medievalpoc, this endless quibbling about what is and is not “historically accurate” can be done away with, and Toni Morrison’s quote here can become creative people of color’s realities:


Apparently this needs to be reblogged again.

Just all of this, all of it.


Today in microfashion…
(Amritsar, India)

Choti guriya


Today in microfashion…

(Amritsar, India)

Choti guriya